SCARY MOVIES II WITH STAR ANNA
Updated: Nov 5, 2021
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #1. Last nights movie was Malignant, directed by James Wan (Saw, Insidious, The Conjuring) and starring Annabelle Wallis, Maddie Hasson and George Young.
The trailer gives off heavy supernatural vibes with killer (pun intended) camera angles and sick synth sounds, reminiscent of some of the best/worst 80’s horror flicks. Between the jarring camera work and watered down Goblinesque music, the preview was tense, confusing and made me say “oh hell yeah.” Minutes into the movie and it’s clear that the preview was a misdirect and I am here for it. We go from the opening scene (that I won’t say anything about other than it’s in a mental hospital and it’s 1993) to present day (did I mention it’s all set in Seattle?) where we meet Madison “Maddie”, who is pregnant and getting home early from work to rest. *Trigger warning* Her husband, who pretty quickly reveals himself to be an abusive piece of shit garbage person, assaults her by punching her in the stomach and slamming her head into the wall and I have to say this is easily the scariest, most upsetting scene in the entire movie. He meets a grisly end from an unknown assailant who also terrorizes Maddie. From there she starts having dreams of violent murders, but are they more than just dreams? Even if you guess the twist halfway through the movie (like I did), it’s still incredibly satisfying and has some great WHAT THE FUCK! moments! It’s camp, it’s cheese, it’s bonkers and I enjoyed the whole dang ride! Maybe not the scariest, but it’s fun and I give it 4 out of 5 skulls 💀💀💀💀! . Tonight’s movie will be Suck. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #malignantmovie
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #2.
I love a good horror/comedy/ and last nights movie, Suck, was definitely that! Written and directed by Rob Stefaniuk (who also plays the band leader), it’s about a rock n roll band, The Winners, trying and failing to succeed, until the bass player (Jessica Paré) shows up to the next gig looking and acting a little different. Her bandmates soon find out she has become a vampire and as unsettled as they are, they realize it might just be their ticket to fame. There are some real gems in the cast including Alice Cooper, Dave Foley (my favorite from Kids In The Hall), Iggy Pop, Henry Rollins and Malcom McDowell as the determined, if not slightly bumbling, Eddie Van Helsing (GET IT?!?!) There’s lots of blood, homages to famous album covers, strange animated interludes, rock music, and blood. All in all, 4 skulls for Suck 💀💀💀💀. I could watch Iggy all day, every day. Tonight’s movie will be Green Room. ♥️You
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #3. Last nights movie was Green Room starring Patrick Stewart and Anton Yelchin
This flick was a cool punk rock thriller with terrific acting, directing and a really great feel for the outskirts of the Pacific Northwest where it was based.
A small time punk band named The Ain’t Rights are on a van tour that finds them in a rural area outside Portland where they’ve been booked in what turns out to be a neo-Nazi punk club.
After their show (where they antagonize the audience full of skinheads by playing a cover of Dead Kennedys “Nazi Punks Fuck Off”), they go to the green room where there’s a small group of people and a girl who’d just been murdered by one of them. The group can’t let the band leave and call the cops so they lock them in the green room with the intent on killing them too. So now The Ain’t Rights are totally screwed and need to figure out a way to escape.
The result is a gritty and realistic vibe with enough tension to snap a heavy chain.
I loved the setting of the PNW punk club and that nothing seemed forced or campy. I dug this unique flick. 4 Skulls for Green Room 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Cabin in the Woods. ♥️You billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #greenroom
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #4. Last nights movie was The Cabin in the Woods starring Bradley Whitford and Richard Jenkins.
Imagine if Westworld, and the gang from Scooby Doo had a date night with a candlelight dinner, a few drinks, turned on some Prince slow jams, got kinky by the fireplace and got knocked up, their kid would be The Cabin in the Woods.
I learned a new word…Meta-Horror. (I’m naive, but I’m trying). This flick was a Meta-Horror flick. It was a parody of the horror genre in a super clever way. I loved it.
You’ve got the teenagers (who were a lot like the Scooby-Doo gang) who go out to spend the weekend in a cabin. Turns out they end up in a Westworld style controlled situation that I won’t spoil, but it does a great job of telling the complicated story.
The gore and creepiness is matched by some killer comedy by the duo of Whitford and Jenkins. Jesus these guys are funny together. There’s a scene with a Japanese classroom that had me rolling on the ground cracking up with Mrs. Disaster looking on disapprovingly and re-thinking her life.
When things get ridiculous in this, they get justified fairly well. You just have to have a little patience. Thank you to all of you that recommended this flick. 4 Skulls for The Cabin in the Woods 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be The Conjuring 3: The Devil Made Me Do It. ♥️You. Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #thecabininthewoods
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #5
Last nights movie was The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It. It’s the third in The Conjuring series. It stars Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson as Lorraine and Ed Warren, the lovable paranormal investigative husband and wife. Lorraine, the clairvoyant and Ed, the self proclaimed demonologist. This movie begins with a possessed 8-year-old named David. His family, as well as Ed, Lorraine and a priest try to exorcise the demon, but the demon isn’t having it. David’s older sisters fiancé, Arne, yells at the demon to leave David and take him instead. So, obviously the demon is like “ you got it, dude.” and jumps into Arne. Then, oops, Arne kills his landlord within the month and is sent to a mental institute while everyone tries to figure out if he was possessed or not. In their search for answers, Ed and Lorraine find themselves face to face with a satanic curse. There were moments throughout that I held my breath for, some cheap and expected jump scares and a recycled formula that felt fresh the first time around but had really lost the magic by movie #3 (hard to believe, I know). I would rather watch the original Conjuring three times in a row and call it good. 2 skulls for The Conjuring 3: The Devil Made Me Do It💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be A Quiet Place Part II. ♥️You billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #theconjuring3
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #6. Last nights movie was A Quiet Place Part II starring Emily Blunt, Millicent Simmonds and Noah Jupe.
The beginning takes us to the event that happens right before A Quiet Place part 1 where we witness the alien invasion. And then it cuts to the story directly following Part 1 a year or so later. What I’m saying is that you need to see the 1st one before you see Part II.
This flick is a rare example of a sequel being as good as its predecessor. I really loved part 1 and I really loved this one.
The premise is aliens have invaded and have fucked almost everything up. They can’t see or smell, but they hear the slightest sound, and when they do, they strike lightning fast. Emily Blunt and her three kids (one of them an infant and the teenage daughter is deaf) set out to find other survivors. And they need to be dead silent.
There is a scene where everyone splits up, and each one ends up in there own danger. The editing that cuts between each person’s plight is one of the most tense and dangerous scenes I’ve ever seen. I needed to do breathing exercises and take a Xanax. Or 10.
The acting in this movie is military grade. Emily Blunt is so good that she can deliver an entire monologue without speaking. And the kids (Simmonds and Jupe) are equally as good. The silent scenes from the deaf girl’s perspective are truly powerful and, well… deafening.
The suspense is thicker than a bowl of oatmeal throughout. Every step taken, one wrong move, a sneeze…you’re screwed.
I will run to the theater if they make a 3rd chapter. 5 Skulls for A Quiet Place Part II 💀💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Lake Mungo. ♥️You billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #aquietplacepart2
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #7.
Last nights movie was the Australian horror film, Lake Mungo. Written and directed by Joel Anderson, it’s presented as a documentary focused on the Palmer family ( a very straight-forward nod to Twin Peaks) as they recount the drowning death of their teenage daughter, Alice (Ally), as well as the seemingly supernatural events that take place immediately after. It’s a compilation of interviews and found footage. (I either hate found footage or love it and this movie definitely falls into the latter.) After the family begins experiencing unexplained noises in their home, Alice’s younger brother, Mathew, sets up cameras, in hopes of capturing Alice’s ghost. They also consult a psychic for some insight. This movie sprawls out in the grieving process and makes itself at home in the fear and uncertainty of death. It’s a slow burn with bursts of twisty turns and leaves a very unsettling impression. Lake Mungo, you get 4 and 1/2 skulls. 💀💀💀💀1/2. Tonight’s movie will be Creep. ♥️You
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #8. Last nights movie was Creep starring Patrick Brice and Mark Duplass.
My appreciation for “lost footage” flicks continues with this one as I really dig the inventiveness that a film maker has to have in order to work with the minimum.
Here we have a cast of just 2 actors, Brice (who also directed) and Duplass. Brice plays Aaron, a freelance videographer who gets a weekend job from a guy named Josef (Duplass) who has a terminal brain tumor. Josef has hired Aaron to document a few of his last days as a diary for his unborn child.
The moment we meet Josef, you can tell that something isn’t quite right, but he’s just normal enough to not say “thanks, but no thanks” and get the fuck outta there. Maybe he’s just eccentric.
What follows is a slow drip of growing fear that uses the lost footage tactic to full effect. And the acting is so good that it feels very real.
The final scenes of this flick was subtle and powerful and will stay in my nightmares for awhile. I’m still shaking as I write this.
Even though I’m afraid to, I’ll definitely review Creep 2 in this series. 4 Skulls for Creep 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be The Voices. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #creep
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #9. Last nights movie was The Voices, starring Ryan Reynolds, as a seemingly nice, slightly awkward and possibly deranged factory worker named Jerry. Jerry is a schizophrenic whose hallucinations manifest as his dog and cat speaking to him. Jerry isn’t taking his medication, something he tells his psychiatrist. He promises to start taking them again but still hesitates because he knows he’ll be lonely without the delusions of his talking pets. Jerry asks a coworker, Fiona, out and she reluctantly agrees, but plans to stand him up. He waits for her at the restaurant while she goes out with other work friends to sing Karaoke. After they leave the bar, she can’t get her car to start but is able to flag down Jerry, who is driving by from the date she stood him up on. Feeling guilty, she agrees to go to a diner with him, but before they can get there, he hits a deer. He hallucinates the deer begging to be put out of its misery so he grabs a hunting knife and slits its throat. Fiona is freaked the fuck out and takes off into the woods. Jerry goes running after her, bloody knife in hand. He trips over her, sharp end of the knife first and essentially does to her what he did to the deer. His dog tries to convince him to turn himself in but his cat is delighted and insists Jerry wanted to kill her and that he will want to kill again. The attempts at humor and quirk are overshadowed by the fact that he is just a delusional, sick, lonely man whose journey to self discovery and understanding involves blasé murdering and dismembering women. The dog was probably the best part of the movie and the cat with the Irish accent was second. Two skulls for this swing and a miss 💀💀.
Tonight’s movie will be You Should Have Left. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #thevoices
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #10.
Last nights movie was the 2020 psychological horror thriller You Should Have Left, starring Kevin Bacon and Amanda Seyfried as the central couple struggling with their marriage. Susanna (Seyfried) is a hot, young actress and Theo (Bacon) is a much older retired banker and they share a six year old daughter, Ella. This isn’t Theo’s first marriage. His first wife drowned in the bathtub and he was a suspect but was ultimately acquitted, though he is still recognized unfavorably by many. Theo tries to visit his wife, Susanna, on set but is denied access. As he waits just feet away from the closed set, he can hear her acting out a sex scene and he is visibly upset. This prompts him to beg her to go away with him and their daughter for a little while before her next job so they can reconnect and strengthen their marriage. She agrees and they book a vacation home in Wales, each of them thinking the other shared the listing. Once they arrive, things start to get spooky. Ella is seeing shadows on the wall, Theo keeps discovering more rooms, hallways and lights, some that won’t turn off and everyone is having bad dreams. I spent almost the entire movie holding my breath and tensely sitting forward as bad dreams blended with reality. Is Theo losing his mind or is the house some sort of hell-scape purgatory? Doors appear and disappear, figures loom in the background, polaroids of him and his family litter a hella scary basement hallway. At one point, Theo and Ella discover that the house is bigger on the inside than on the outside. There’s a lot of metaphor in this film about relationships, guilt, trust and the decisions made in the past that come back to haunt us. You Should Have Left was suspenseful, weird, and spooky. I give it 4 1/2 skulls! 💀💀💀💀1/2. Tonight’s movie will be Creep 2. ♥️You billiydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #kevinbacon
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #11. Last nights movie was Creep 2 starring Mark Duplass and Desiree Akhavan. (Spoilers)
The end of Creep 1 was, for me, a unique and truly shocking scene because it made me feel like I had just witnessed a murder in real life. In fact, it was so realistic that if fucked me up to the point that I might need counseling:). It was so powerful that I couldn’t wait to jump into Creep 2.
Mark Duplass, who also directs this, plays Aaron, the eccentric rich guy that hires videographers to spend the day filming him for various made up reasons. He then takes them on little assignments for them to film him with which basically feeds his psychotic ego and then uses their camera to get footage of him murdering them.
In this case, the victim is Sara (Ajhavan) who answers his want ad as she is trying to make a web series called “Encounters” where she creates videos of just people living their singular lives. In the 1st moments of her meeting Aaron, he matter of factly tells her that he’s a serial killer with convincing detail. However, Sara suspects that he’s just being an eccentric rich guy trying to invoke a reaction.
This “lost footage” flick dances to the same groove as it’s predecesor and therefor loses most of the fear factor. I would actually almost call this a comedy before I would call it a horror flick. But Duplass is so perfectly perfect playing this character that, even though it wasn’t as scary as the 1st one, it was still compelling.
Perhaps someone can explain the ending to me..I think it’s meant to introduce the possibility of a 3rd installment, but, who was filming? 3 Skulls for Creep 2 💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be The Strangers (Netflix). ♥️You billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #Creep2 #moviereviewsblog
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #12. Last nights movie was The Strangers starring Liv Tyler and Scott Speedman. Directed by Bryan Bertino
The first 20 minutes artistically attempts to set up a story. It’s beautiful and focuses on Liv Tyler’s gentle and gorgeous appeal. She plays Kristen who goes to a secluded vacation home with her boyfriend James (Speedman) after a friend’s wedding. During the evening, James proposes marriage which Kristen wisely turns down.
It was a good call as James is a total fucking rich white douche bag with cliché rich boy control issues…(“I said get back in the house right now Kristen! I’ll handle it!”).🤮
Problem is, James can’t handle anything. He doesn’t even know how to handle a shotgun until he shoots his buddy in the face like he’s Dick Fucking Cheney. I hate James.
Anyway…Some weird and mysterious masked people invade the house and terrorize them with some standard hide and seek tension and sound design.
Question…why are the two Jehovah’s Witness kids at the end walking their bikes on a beautiful day on flat roads in a wide open space?
This flick sucked. Long, boring and meaningless scenes with no story and worthless characters. 1 Skull for the The Strangers 💀. Tonight’s movie will be There’s Someone Inside Your House by @patrickbrice the dude that brought us Creep 1 and 2. ♥️You. (Except you James. Douch bag🖕) Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #thestrangers #TheresSomeoneInsideYourHouse @bryanbertino
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #13. Last nights movie was There’s Someone Inside Your House starring Sydney Park and Dale Whibley.
If John Hughes and Stephen king got drunk together and decided to make a slasher after school special feature, this is the flick they would end up with.
Like a John Hughes film, we get to know the characters and the small town setting through the eyes of high school kids, which I love. And this flick does a damn good job of it.
Each character in the ensemble cast is a teen with their various single life difficulties, some of which are pretty dark. And there’s a killer out there who is dead set on exposing some of these skeletons in their closets and punishing them. 🔪🩸.
Also like a John Hughes flick, a rich kid (Whibley)throws a party in his dad’s bazillion dollar mansion where this character has the chance to become one of the legendary weed smokers in cinema history up there with Cheech and Chong and Spicoli by inventing some truly inventive ways to get high with his dads WWII memorabilia.
Unfortunately, halfway through this movie it becomes an after school special where the teens try to solve the mysterious murders in the town like they’re the Scooby-Doo gang and take ridiculous chances to do so.
This was made by the same dude that did Creep and Creep 2, both of which are far better. But the characters are cool and well acted There is some great suspense, and the music is killer. 3 Skulls for There’s Someone Inside Your House 💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Bad Candy. ♥️You. Billydisaster.com #moviereview #MovieReviews #There’sSomeoneInsideYourHouse #Netflix @patrickbrice
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #14
Last nights movie was Bad Candy. It was a low budget, cheesy, campy, B-grade bonanza and I loved it. It was terrible in all the best ways. It’s impossible to deny that it’s a near replica of Trick or Treat, the cult 2007 Halloween film (that Billy Disaster should watch and review). Both intertwine a collection of short scary stories that happen over the course of one Halloween night. In Bad Candy, which takes place in New Salem, it’s a radio DJ sharing these twisted tales over the air as they seemingly play out in real time. The main monster is the terrifying Jack In The Box clown, hell bent on punishing ‘bad apples’ in the town, but he’s not the only one out for blood. The special effects are crude and hilarious but most of them pack a gruesome punch. This movie made me laugh and cringe and I even closed my eyes for a couple of extra gross scenes. Overall, it felt like a hell of a fun movie to make, which made it a hell of a fun movie to watch. It was dumb, gory, entertaining and I loved it. So fuck it, 5 skulls. 💀💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Host. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #badcandy #halloween #scaryflicks
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #15. Last nights movie was Host directed by Rob Savage. What a cool idea this flick was. A movie made for the Covid lockdown era for the Zoom generation. A group of British college age friends decide to hire a woman named Seylan (Seylan Baxter) who specializes in conducting seances. Because of the Covid lockdown, they conduct this through Zoom. Their intent is to summon deceased family, pets etc. just to see if they can communicate with them. One of the friends fucks up and they end up summoning something very unfriendly. Not the most original plot, but because its all done on a Zoom meeting from the audience’s perspective, it’s uniquely awesome on a number of levels. Most of all, you feel as if you’re on their Zoom meeting yourself. It might even be a good idea to watch this flick on your computer. Also, the fact that you have a few different sequences happening at the same time on the multiple Zoom screens is a killer tactic as not only do you witness the scenes, but the reactions of the friends as well. I loved that! Cheers to Rob Savage for making such a cool and original flick. 4 Skulls for Host 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be What Keeps You Alive. ♥️You billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #hostmovieSee Less
— with Star Anna Krogstie.
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #16. Last nights movie was What Keeps You Alive starring Brittany Allen and Hanna Anderson. I wanna spoil the story for this flick so bad! But I won’t. You’re just gonna have to see it.
It’s basically a cabin in the woods horror film done stylishly and artistically.
The highlight of this movie is the performance of Brittany Allen as Jules who goes to spend the weekend with her wife at a rural lakeside vacation home for their 1 year anniversary. Allen’s performance is so good that it’s exhausting. She also composed the score which is truly awesome.
Another highlight is the film making by director Colin Minihan. His use of some Hitchcock influences in the story telling and overall pace was excellent and the editing synced with the music added a killer effect to the tension. It’s impressive. OH! And the scenes that use Beethoven 1st movement of the 9th symphony, the Moonlight Sonata and the 2nd movement of the 7th symphony was my JAM! I fucking loved that!
One more highlight…The patience used to set up the 1st act of violence made the scene so surprising and shocking that I needed to take a moment to recover.
There’s a glaring problem tho…The killer in this flick ultimately sucks. The actor is shamefully unconvincing as a dangerous and psychotic killer. It’s mind boggling that they stuck with this actor for this role as it’s painfully obvious that it almost ruins a very good film. Think Keanu Reeves and Dracula or Natalie Portman in Star Wars.
This would have been a 5 Skull flick had it not been for the poor casting. So 3 Skulls for What Keeps You Alive 💀💀💀. Tonight‘s movie will be Feast. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #whatkeepsyoualive #brittanyallen
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #17
Last nights movie was
(2005). A superb suggestion from my dear friend and horror movie aficionado, Emma Pie, was Feast. This film was the product of Project Greenlight (season 3), an amateur filmmaking competition show put on by Ben Affleck and Matt Damon. It also has Wes Craven’s name attached to it. Boy howdy, was this movie fun. And gross. And hilarious. And gross. Set in a dive bar in the middle of the desert, we are introduced to the motley crew of patrons and employees. Edgy Cat, Harley Mom, Beer Guy and Honey Pie are just a few of the oddball folks hanging around this seedy establishment. Pretty quickly, things get crazy, as an unknown man, referred to only as “Hero”, bursts through the door to warn everyone of impending danger. When he is received with skepticism, he shows them the head of some horrific creature and says these monsters are on their way now. Before they can even process what he’s trying to tell them, he is ripped through the window and decapitated. Blood, so much blood. Now everyone must band together to survive the night. The following 80 something minutes are an all out blood bath, monster fuck fest full of hilarity and gore. It has just a tinge of From Dusk Til Dawn, but much, much, MUCH less refined. Both Henry Rollins and Jason Mewes (Jay of Jay and Silent Bob fame) are in this movie so I was stoked about that. Feast is not for the faint of heart or stomach, that’s for sure. I’m gonna give this horror/comedy/action movie 3 1/2 skulls. 💀💀💀1/2. Tonight’s movie will be Anything for Jackson. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #moviereviewsblog #feast
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #18. Last nights movie was Anything For Jackson starring Sheila McCarthy and Julian Richings.
So we’ve got a very typical Grandma (McCarthy) and Grandpa (Richings) who have lost their young grandson in a tragic accident. Through their grief, they discover that The Church of Satan has a way of bringing back the dead through host bodies. So why not go for it?! Let’s kidnap a pregnant woman and see if her unborn child could be reincarnated through a Satanic ritual!
As far fetched from real life as this all sounds, the acting and the script are so good and realistic that this all seems reasonable.
There are some truly unsettling and shocking events in this flick mixed with a subtle and dry sense of humor. The acting is almost more in tune with a serious drama and the characters each have their own aspects of likability.
I love Satanic flicks as they freak me out the most. And I really dug this one. 4 Skulls for Anything For Jackson 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #horrorflicks #anythingforjackson #shudder
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #19. Last nights movie was A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night starring Sheila Vand and Arash Marandi. Directed by Ana Lily Amipour.
If I didn’t know any better, I thought this would have been a Jim Jarmusch flick. The look, the pace, and the characters are all very Jarmuschesque. Particularly Stanger Than Paradise and a little
bit of the amazing Only Lovers Left Alive since this is a Vampire movie.
These comparisons are a good thing. Almost everything in this flick is beautiful. It’s filmed in black and white and the photography is killer, and most of the people are darkly stunning.
Although it was filmed in California, this is an Iranian film set in a fictional Iranian place called Bad City. There’s not much of a story here but it’s still hauntingly engaging. It’s also a slow burn with the only mid-tempo provided by the drug dealing pimp asshole, Saeed played perfectly by Dominic Rains early on.
What this flick isn’t is scary. It’s a stylish artsy fartsy indi romantic Vampire film which is fine, but doesn’t really belong in this Scary Flicks series that were doing. But it still gets 4 Skulls 💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Haunt (on Shudder). ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #vampire #agirlwalkshomealoneatnight
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #20 Last nights movie was Haunt starring a bunch of unimpressed teenagers who just can’t even.
I’ll start with the good…A group of teenagers end up finding a haunted house that ends up being a hell of a lot more than a regular haunted house. As haunted houses go, this one is very good and is filmed so beautifully that I wanna high five the cinematographer. Each room is uniquely freaky and the patience used to scare us is damn near perfectly perfect.
However…the attempt to tell a story here is embarrassing. 1st of all, we never find out anything about the psycho killers that run the house and the half ass attempt to try to establish a back story on one of the teenagers is just disjointed and worthless.
There’s an actor in this flick (Andrew Louis Caldwell) that is so shitty that I’m surprised they didn’t cut all of his scenes. His character was such an annoying douche, and what the hell was he wearing?! He should’ve been fired along with the costume designer.
That being said, I still enjoyed this flick. The scare tactics were pretty clever and the music was cool. 3 Skulls for Haunt 💀💀💀. Tonight‘s movie will be Let the Right One In. ♥️You (except you Andrew Lewis Caldwell). Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #HorrorMovies #shudder #hauntedhouse
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #21 Last nights movie was Let the Right One In directed by Thomas Alfredson.
A big Thank You to those that recommended this flick to me. I loved this one.
Set in the early 80s in a small wintery Swedish town, a 12 year old boy named Oskar (Kare Hedebrant) suffers from loneliness and school bullies. (He also wears super rad clothes). He lucks out and befriends a girl seemingly his age named Eli (Lina Leandersson) who is a Vampire. And also about 200 years old trapped in her 12 year old self.
Eli lives in the same projects style apartment complex as Oskar with a much older man named Hakan (Per Ragner). Their relationship is a mystery through much of this movie, but when we do find out what there connection is, it’s shown with such extreme subtlety and care that you can’t deny the talent of the filmmaker. It’s master storytelling.
This movie is so well made that you can actually feel how cold the winter is, how debilitating the loneliness of these kids is, and how ultimately isolated the town seems. It really is powerful.
As Vampire flicks go, this one is one of a kind. It’s almost like a regular drama that just happens to have a Vampire in it. The focus on the young love with Eli and Oskar is complex and inspiring. Eli is so grateful for his friendship that he barely blinks at the fact that Eli is a Vampire who needs to feed.
There are quite a few ins and outs that contribute to the story. All of them meaningful. And while it’s not all that scary, there is an ever present tension and sense of danger. But it’s also super emotional and endearing. 5 Skulls for Let the Right One In 💀💀💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be Things Heard and Seen. ♥️You. Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #lettherightonein #halloween
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #22
Last night's movie was Things Heard And Seen, a ghost story set in upstate New York at the end of 1979. It’s like a Lifetime Original version of Amityville Horror. Catherine (Amanda Seyfried) and George Clare (James Norton) and their young daughter, Franny, relocate from Manhattan to a small town
upstate after George gets a job teaching art history at a college. Catherine seems a little reluctant about the move, but feels she owes it to George. Feeling isolated in the old farm house, and after experiencing several supernatural events, Catherine begins to do a little digging on the history of the house and realizes they may not be alone. She also begins to realize that her husband has a lot of dark secrets. Most of the spook effects were cheesy and tame, especially compared to the Lynch-esque scene in the kitchen when Catherine pulls something out of the drain. Spoiler alert-It’s not hair! There are only a few promising moments littered throughout the first 2/3 of the film but they never amount to much more than disjointed ambiance. Most of the actors were good, especially Amanda Seyfried, F. Murray Abraham and Rhea Seehorn, but the film as a whole was a struggle. 1 1/2 Skulls. 💀1/2. Tonight’s movie will be The Conjuring. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #halloween #horrormovies
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #23 Last nights movie was The Conjuring starring Patrick Wilson and the SMOKIN HOT Vera Farmiga.
Ok, so just when I thought I was totally de-sensitized by watching so many horror flicks this month, this one got me. I figured I couldn’t be scared by anything anymore. I was wrong.
Satanic shit scares me. Paranormal shit scares me too, and so this was really unsettling.
Set in 1971, it’s about this family (2 parents, 5 daughters and their dog, Sadie) who spend all of their money and move into a big house on a big property in Rhode Island. Turns out this house had been the location of a sacrificed baby and a suicide 100 or so years ago. So, of course, it’s haunted.
The family experiences a full array of weird and ghostly happenings (that scared the shit out if me) and they go full Poltergeist by hiring paranormal specialists (Wilson and Farmiga♥️) to check everything out. And, like Poltergeist, they set up motion camers and mics all over the house to try to capture evidence etc..
As a whole, this flick works as a scary flick, the characters and the actors who perform them are all cool. The overall direction and craft was good and effective, but then they SHIT THE BED at the end! They went full fucking Hollywood with a stupid Hollywood ending that makes me want to watch nothing but foreign films from now on. I threw my remote at my TV in disgust.
Anyway, the ending didn’t entirely ruin this movie, but it did dock a Skull from it. 3 Skulls for The Conjuring 💀💀💀. Tonight’s movie will be The Conjuring 2. ♥️You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #theconjuring #theconjuring2 #halloween
Scary Flicks With Billy Disaster #24 Last nights movie was The Conjuring 2 starring Vera Farmiga and Patrick Wilson.
Not surprisingly, this is a hell of a lot like The Conjuring 1, but this time it’s sent in London and has an additional layer to the paranormal element. A single mother with no money and her 4 kids live in their home where there are ghosts that harass them and possesses one of the daughters. Wilson and Farmiga (being the ghostbusters) are called u
pon to deal with it and blah blah blah.
Why am I being mean to this flick? Well it’s not because of the performances (which are great), and not because of the scare tactics (which are fine)…but because this flick falls right into the Hollywood trap of paint by numbers campiness. I hate that shit. Like when two characters are talking about something sentimental or personal and they cue the light heartstrings music…Please! That got old in the 1950s. It’s just so out of place in a flick like this. And the Shitty Hollywood ending! It was almost like a Disney princess movie.
Oh! And when The Crooked Man makes his appearance, I thought I was suddenly watching a Tim Burton kids movie. It just didn’t fit.
Im stoked that Star reviewed the 3rd installment of this trilogy so didn’t have to. 2 Skulls for The Conjuring 2 . Tonight’s movie will be The Lodge. Happy Halloween! You Billydisaster.com #moviereview #moviereviews #theconjuring2 #halloween
Scary Flicks With Star Anna #25.
Last nights movie was The Lodge. The (unrelated) follow up to Austrian Directors Severin Faila and Veronika Franz’s debut film Goodnight, Mommy (2014). The Lodge is an intensely dark study on loss, grief and revenge. Aiden and his younger sister, Mia, suffer the loss of their depressed mother (Alicia Silverstone), who commits suicide upon learning her estranged husband, Richard, intends on marrying his girlfriend, Grace. Grace (Riley Keough) was raised in an extremist Christian cult, led by her father and was the sole surviver of their mass suicide years prior. Richard met her while researching the cult for work. The children, who already disliked her, blame her for their mothers death and their resentment towards her is very palpable. Six months later, Richard tells his children that they will be spending Christmas at their VERY REMOTE lodge in Massachusetts with Grace and that he will drop them all off before heading out the next morning to go back to the city to work for a few days and return on Christmas day. He hopes that the time together will help the kids and Grace bond. Instead, Aiden and Mia go out of their way to make clear how much they do not accept her. Mia shows her the Christmas gift they made their father, which is a home video of them at the lodge when their mom and dad were still together. Aiden refuses to speak to her and when he does it’s with animosity. Around the third night there, tensions seem to ease and the children and Grace fall asleep in the living room watching a movie (first, The Thing and then Frosty The Snowman). In the morning Grace discovers that all of their belongings (including her medication) are gone and the power is out. The weather outside is getting worse and they have no way to leave or contact anyone. Thinking it’s some awful prank at first, she chastises the kids, but they are also shaken by the events and have no explanation. Things only get worse from there. Way worse. Is the house haunted? Is there someone or something else there with them? Is Grace losing her mind? The cinematography is stunning. Stark shots of white snow as far as the eye can see feel as claustrophobic as scenes of the interior of the dark cabin. The plot has a steady pace, never dragging too long and the ending is a deafening crescendo of spine tingling panic. Just like in The Thing, they know the evil is there but they don’t know what it is and nothing is as it seems. 4 1/2 skulls for this one. 💀💀💀💀 1/2
