CHICK FLICKS

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #1 Last night’s movie was The Proposal starring Deadpool and Sandra Bullock♥️. (Note..I’m only reviewing movies I haven’t previously seen. And all of these Rom Coms will be graded by the standard that Bridesmaids and The Artist set. The 2 best chick flicks I’ve ever seen).

So The Proposal is about a high powered career woman (Bullock) who faces deportation to Canada as her visa in the US has expired. She works out a shady deal with her assistant (Deadpool) to marry her so she can stay. But It has to look legit so he takes her to Alaska to meet his family. Neither one of them are stoked about each other but they have a deal. When they get to Alaska she finds out that his family is super rich (gag! Why?) and pretty damn tight. (With regular family problems)..anyway, they go through some very awkward and predictable motions. Is it funny?..it has Betty White in it so yes. It’s also very easy and comfortable to watch. Like a chick flick is supposed to be. 3 roses for The Proposal🌹🌹 🌹. tonight’s movie will be 27 dresses. ♥️ You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #2. Last nights movie was 27 Dresses starring Katherine Heigl, James Marsden, and The Smokin Hot Malin Akerman♥️ (who was also in CFWBD #1 The Proposal)..

So 27 dresses is about a girl who is like a professional bridesmaid (Heigl) that is constantly going to weddings. She is also an executive assistant to a man she’s secretly in love with (Edwards Burns). Well her sister (Akerman) shows up to stay with her for a while and ends up hooking up with Heigl’s boss. They hit it off so well that they decide to get married. Now Heigl has a wedding to plan that is obviously painful for her. And Akerman makes it more difficult by being a bridezilla. Meanwhile Heigl is spotted by James Marsden at a couple of weddings (he’s like a gossip writer for the city newspaper). He’s into her but she’s not into him (how does she not see how handsome this guy is)..Anyway, a lot of regular modern Rom Com shit happens that makes this movie fun and easy to watch. For me the best part of it was Heigl’s best friend (Judy Greer). She plays a very good side character and is hilarious. 3 roses for 27 dresses🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie with be How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. ♥️ You

1. Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #3. Last nights movie was How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days starring Kate Hudson and Matthew McConaughey. You guys, this is what I call a Rom Com! A cool story that was done well on every front (except the music). It’s about Kate who writes for a Cosmo style magazine. Her boss (Lilith from Cheers) gives her an assignment to date a guy and do all the annoying things she can to get rid of him in 10 days and then write about it. Meanwhile, McConaughey, who works at an ad agency is offered an account for a diamond company if he can get a girl to fall in love with him in 10 days. Hudson and McConaughey find each other and unknowingly to the other make each other their person to complete their challenge. Hudson and McConaughey Are awesome at playing out the next 10 days with various scenarios that are relevant and hilarious. The side characters are also very good. Especially Lt. Dangle from Reno 911. 4 roses for How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days🌹🌹🌹🌹. Tonight’s movie is going to be Addicted to Love. ♥️ You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #4. Last nights movie was Addicted To Love starring Meg Ryan and Matthew Broderick🤢..Before last night, the worst movie I ever saw was Anger Management with Jack Nicholson and Adam Sandler. That position has now been taken by Addicted To Love. God this movie was awful. It’s basically about Matthew’s girlfriend leaves him in their small town to move to the big city to chase her dreams. He follows her there so he can spy on her and her new douche bag French boyfriend🤢 through the windows in a flat across the street. (Creepy dude. No wonder this movie was made by Harvey Weinstein). . As it turns out Frenchy was Meg Ryan’s ex boyfriend. She finds Matthew spying and joins in and blah blah fucking blah. The only reason I’m not giving this zero roses is because Meg Ryan is so good even when she has to work with the terrible Broderick🤮. Watching him act is like watching a 2nd grade play. 1 rose for Addicted To Love🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be My Best Friends wedding. ♥️ You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #5. Last night’s movie was My Best Friend’s Wedding starring Julia Roberts and Cameron Diaz. So this movie should have won the Academy Award for The Boringest Movie Ever Made. (I know boringest is not really a word but I just invented it for you guys). It’s about this guy and this girl who love each other but not in that way and then they do but he’s gonna marry this other girl and blah blah fucking blah. This movie sucked so bad I walked out...of my own house. Seriously, we are going to step it up here at CFWBD...1 rose for My Best Friend’s Wedding🌹 . I keep hearing that My Big Fat Greek Wedding is a lot of people’s favorite so that’s tonight’s movie ♥️ You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #6. Last night’s movie was My Big Fat Greek Wedding starring Nia Vardalos and John Corbett. The short string of awful movies has ended with this one . There is so much to love here. It seems that there is a template for Rom Coms (meet the characters, go through awkward and hopefully clever and funny story lines and let love prevail in the end), and MBFGW does all of this really well. Every character here is great except for Corbett who is basically there to amplify everyone else by being as vanilla as possible. Everyone else is full on Greek. (Can this movie be made in America today being as nationalistic as this?) Anyway, it’s about a woman named Toula who is stuck living and working with her large and very tight family at age 30 and wants to branch out. She meets Vanilla Boy and falls in love. Problem is...He’s not Greek. The comedy that comes out of this is killer. Especially from Toula’s Dad. He is the star of this movie where there is steep competition. (The whole Windex thing!..fucking hilarious!). MBFGW had me laughing out loud and crying in the end... “In the end, we’re all just fruit”..4 roses for My Big Fat Greek Wedding.🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie is considered by many to be the greatest Rom Com of all time...Annie Hall. We’ll see. ♥️you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #7. Last nights movie was Annie Hall starring Woody Allen and Diane Keaton. So I’m a huge Larry David fan and have been for ever. But little did I know that I’ve been watching a Woody Allen impression all this time. I’m bringing a very naïve perspective to Annie Hall as it’s the 1st Woody Allen movie I’ve seen. This movie is very New York, very Jewish humor (my favorite), and all around incredible. It seems the only difference between Larry David and Woody Allen is LD plays a neurotic sociopath and WA plays a neurotic intellectual. Diane Keaton plays WA’s girlfriend and she is terrific. Which is refreshing since I’ve never really liked her characters. Woody Allen is like the Eddie Van Halen of comedy. Smart and fast with perfect delivery. There’s not much story here, just a stage play on screen displaying a relationship. This movie is The Godfather of Rom Coms. 5 roses for Annie Hall.🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Crazy, Stupid, Love. ♥️ you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #8. Last night’s movie was Crazy, Stupid, Love starring The 40 Year Old Virgin, Julianne Moore and half of La La Land. Much of this movie was really difficult for me to watch as many of my worst nightmares occur in it (wife cheats and wants divorce, kids let down by Dad etc.). However CSL is truly funny and ultimately very sweet. It’s about Steve Carell finding himself back on the dating scene after his asshole wife (Moore) sleeps with asshole Kevin Bacon and wants a divorce. So he ends up meeting Ryan Gosling (huge asshole) in a singles bar who takes him on to be an asshole trainee so he can alpha male his way into picking up chicks. A few other side stories go on most notably Carell’s 13 year old son falling in love with his 17 year old babysitter. The real gem of this movie is the amazing culmination in the last 20 minutes. So very clever and sentimental. 4 roses for Crazy, Stupid, Love🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Definitely Maybe. ♥️ you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #9. Last night’s movie was Definitely Maybe starring Deadpool 2 and Little Miss Sunshine. This movie was kinda ok..It was amusing as Ryan Reynolds is just naturally funny and Abigail Breslin is a truly talented young actor. It’s about a Dad who is getting divorced (for reasons we’re never told...annoying) who finds himself having to describe his dating life to his young daughter before he met her Mom. The story telling is actually pretty clever but the scenes that deliver the story are kinda lame and dragged out. I do think that I’m gonna make one of the characters (Rachel Weisz♥️) my new celebrity girlfriend so that helped make this movie a little more worthwhile. 3 roses for Definitely Maybe🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Notting Hill. ♥️you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #10. Last night’s movie was Notting Hill starring Julia Robert’s and The Super Chaughming Hugh Grant. If I had Hugh Grant’s English accent, I’d have to fight off Mrs. Disaster with a stick all day every day. That accent is just not fair. Anyway, This movie is about a guy (Hugh) who lives in London England and owns a small bookstore and lives with his degenerate roommate. One day his store is visited by a gigantic movie star (Roberts) and she falls immediately in love with him. Hugh’s life is turned upside down with a sudden relationship with a famous star. The pros of this movie are the performances and some funny and intriguing scenes. The cons are that the relationship in this story is rushed through too quickly and makes it difficult to fully engage. And the montage of their romance in the middle is so cringy (made up word) that I threw a shoe at my TV. This movie was like a Disney princess story but flipped. 3 roses for Notting Hill 🌹🌹🌹. Tonight’s movie will be About Last Night (the 1986 version). ♥️you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #11. Last night’s movie was About Last Night starring Demi Moore and Rob Lowe. Watching this movie was like taking a time machine back to the 80’s (for the ladies!). It’s about learning how to be in an adult relationship in your mid 20s. Moving in together, trying to navigate holidays and friends etc. The comedy in this movie comes from the belligerent James Belushi who is loud and filterless. Both Lowe and Moore are really good at portraying their characters as real people. Nothing superficial here. The downside of this movie is it is montage hell! There are like 5 montages. I hate montages. But I still enjoyed this one. 4 roses for About Last Night🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be The Other Woman. ♥️you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #12. Last night’s movie was The Other Woman starring Leslie Mann♥️, Cameron Diaz and Nikki Minaj. First of all, my apologies to Rachel Weisz. Our romance was fleeting but I’m moving on. Congratulations to Leslie Mann♥️ on being my new celebrity girlfriend! I’m seeing a bright future. Anyway...The Other Woman is about a high powered lawyer (Diaz) who is dating this total douche bag (Nikolaj Coster Waldau). One evening she decides to surprise him by showing up at his house only to find out he’s married! To Leslie Mann♥️! So behind Waldau’s back, Diaz and Mann become partners in getting revenge on him and his womanizing ways. The 1st 75% of this movie is really awesome! Diaz is great but Mann is the star here. She is next level funny. Unfortunately the last 25% loses the momentum and ruins what could’ve been a classic. Cheers to the eye candy appearances by Minaj and Kate Upton. 4 roses for the ultimately fun The Other Woman🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Cary Grant’s His Girl Friday. ♥️ you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #13. Last night’s movie was His Girl Friday starring Cary Grant and Rossalind Russell. I selected this movie because it is considered one of the greatest comedies ever made and has 98% on Rotten Tomatoes. I understand that in 1940 it was innovative in its production and they attempted to set the record for the fastest ever dialogue (no joke). And I bet they did. They were like auctioneers on speed. While I appreciate the incredible skill it must’ve taken the actors to pull off their performances, I hated watching this movie. The dialogue is so fast that it was aggravating. And the actors had to basically shout their lines. I felt like my TV snorted a bunch of coke and picked a fight with me while I sat in my house trying to be reasonable. When it was over I calmly asked, “ Are you are finished screaming at me now? If so, get the fuck out of my house and get yourself cleaned up.” 2 roses for His Girl Friday 🌹🌹. Tonight’s movie will be Love Actually. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #14. Last night’s movie was Love Actually starring a shitload of British actors. Love Actually is like 9 movies in 1. All of which would have probably been good movies on their own. My favorite being the one with Liam Neeson playing a widowed step dad raising his step son played incredibly by Thomas Sangster who was probably about 9 years old. I don’t think there’s anything better than a great child actor and this kid is a virtuoso. My other favorite is the story of the washed up rock star played by Bill Nighty who is fully aware that he’s making a shitty Christmas record. The other stand out performance is by Emma Thompson. She’s like the Meryl Streep of British actors. All in all, pretty much everyone in this movie is awesome. And I’m like the 3 hot asses in Wisconsin, I’m a sucker for British accents. 4 roses for Love Actually🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Don Jon. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #15. Last night’s movie was Don Jon starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt🤢, Scarlett Johansson, and Julianne Moore. Let me be subtle… I fucking hated this movie! I chose it because Scarlett Johansson and Julianne Moore were in it and I figured that gave it credibility. Levitt wrote, directed and starred in this pile of garbage. He plays this Jersey Italian American dickhead who has an addiction to porn. He’s like The Situation in Jersey Shore (seriously ladies..do you really find this kind of guy attractive?🤢)..Him and his friends go to clubs and act all macho to pick up chicks. (By the way, this movie got 79% on Rotten Tomatoes. I bet you could meet that 79% at Trump rallies wearing red hats)...(Oh, and by the other way, Levitt isn’t even Italian American. This role is why people get pissed off about cultural appropriation. He might as well have been doing black face )...Anyway he meets and falls for Johansson who plays a shallow Jersey Barbie Doll. He takes her home to meet his family (his dad is Charles in Charge) and blah blah blah. 1 rose for Don Jon.🌹. Tonight’s movie will be The Family Stone. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #16. Last night’s movie was The Family Stone starring Sarah Jessica Parker, Diane Keaton, Luke Wilson and many others. Now don’t get me wrong, This movie is pretty good with interesting characters and good acting. However I didn’t enjoy it as much as I had hoped. There are funny moments but it’s not really a funny movie. There is too much sadness hanging over it. Rachel McAdams and Sarah Jessica Parker provide most of the comedy which is mostly what I’m looking for in a romcom. But this movie is just too serious. And one part of the story was so stupid. Seriously, dude’s trying to marry his girlfriend’s sister within 24 hours of meeting her? Please! 2 roses for The Family Stone🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be 13 Going On 30. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #17. Last night’s movie was 13 going on 30 starring Jennifer Garner and Mark Ruffalo. This movie was refreshing and quite funny in many ways. It’s about an awkward 13 year old girl who is given some magic dust from her neighbor boy best friend that makes wishes come true. Her wish was to be 30. So she wakes up as a 30 year old Jennifer Garner. Garner plays a 30 year old with a 13 year old’s mind so perfectly that she made Tom Hanks in Big look like an amateur. There are a few spots in the story that are a bit ridiculous, but overall it was truly enjoyable. And it’s funny that Mark Ruffalo looks and acts just like Jason Rubin (The bass player in ITC). Handsome in a corky way and dry and weird. 4 roses for 13 going on 30 🌹🌹🌹🌹. Tonight‘s movie will be Forgetting Sarah Marshall. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #18. Last nights movie was Forgetting Sarah Marshall starring Jason Segal and Kristen Bell. This movie started out with a cringy hilarious scene that gave it promise. However FSM suffers from quite a few disappointments. #1..It features Russell Brand reprising his role as Aldous Snow from the much better Get Him To The Greek. So you can’t help but to compare the two..#2..Jonah Hill who is also in both movies plays a different character which was such a weird decision. #3..This is a Judd Apatow movie that just doesn’t stack up to his other great movies. The story was a good idea..Segal’s girlfriend (Bell) leaves him for Snow. Segal goes to Hawaii to mend his heart only to find that Snow and his now ex girlfriend are staying at the same hotel. The main problem here is that the comedic timing is off, the editing doesn’t flow, the performances are lazy, and the payoff is lame. Apologies to all who loved this movie but 2 roses for Forgetting Sarah Marshall🌹🌹 . Tonight’s movie will be Bridget Jone’s Diary. ♥️You

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #19. Last nights movie was Bridget Jone’s Diary starring Renée Zellweger, Hugh Grant and Colin Firth. I have no idea how movies are made, but it’s obvious to me that the people that made this movie kick the shit out of the people who made Forgetting Sarah Marshall (CFWBD #18) some of the humor in FSM was so forced that they had to explain their jokes (like they had to say “get it?” after the line). Where in Bridget Jone’s Diary the humor flowed like a breeze. Zellweger is funny as hell and great all around. So is everyone else (except maybe Firth, he kinda sucked). BJD is about a 30 something year old woman who decides to get her life together and get a man. She ends up in an affair with her asshole boss (Grant) and then finds her self in a love triangle including the boring Firth. The comedy in this movie is very British which I love. Do you guys recommend any of the sequels? 4 roses for Bridget Jones‘s Diary🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Tonight‘s movie will be Friends with kids. Happy Thanksgiving!

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #20. Last nights movie was Friends With Kids starring Adam Scott and Jennifer Westfeldt. (Kristen Wiig, John Hamm and Maya Rudolph were supporting actors in this movie?...weird)...This movie was...WHITE. Not mid western Trump white but big city “Friends” white privilege white. I felt like my house was invaded by gentrification. It’s like someone just opened a Pilates studio in my kitchen. This movie listens to The Dave Matthews band. This movie was so white it has season tickets to The Sounders. This movie just ordered a pumpkin spice half decaf 2 pump latte. This movie was so white it just went skiing in Whistler. (This is fun..)..anyway it’s about a a guy and a girl who are best friends and single and they want to have a baby together but just remain friends and blah blah fucking blah. 1 rose 🌹for Friends With Kids . Tonight’s movie (Never Been Kissed) will be the final installment of Chick Flicks with Billy Disaster:(. It’s been so fun! December will be Holiday Movies with Billy Disaster! I hope you’ll join me. ♥️you

Chick Flicks With Billy Disaster #21. My longtime friend

Jenn Baggs

recommended last night’s movie Never Been Kissed starring Drew Barrymore, David Arquette and Mr. Cellophane. I can see her telling her friends “Watch this,..I’m gonna have Billy watch this awful movie and then we’ll laugh and laugh “. So this one was about Drew as a 25 year newspaper copyist who wants to be a journalist. She gets her break by getting an assignment to pretend like she’s a 17 year old high school student and report on it. If she screws it up, she’ll lose her job. Some funny stuff happens and then she develops a crush on her English teacher. He responds with a slow burn seduction even though he thinks SHE’S 17! And this movie plays it off like it’s OK. When he finds out she’s actually 25 (and legal) HE GETS UPEST AND SHUNS HER! What a creep!! And then there are the incredibly lame performances by David Arquette🤢 and Mr Cellophane. This is truly John C Reilly‘s worst performance I’ve ever seen. Well played Jenn. You got me. 2 roses for Never Been Kissed🌹🌹 . That’s it for Chick Flicks. You guys have made this so much fun! Thank you! You all get 5 roses🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 . Stay tuned for Holiday Flicks With Billy Disaster coming soon. ♥️You